Monday 7 September 2015

In the News

                In the news today a Christian Fundamentalist group calling itself Soldiers for Christ blew up a building in an upscale part of the Saudi capital Riyadh, killing 25 people and injuring 77 in the process. Its claim is that it believes that it is about time that Christians be recognized as an oppressed minority in the Kingdom and that women of all religions should be given equal opportunity in the ultra conservative country. The leader of the group, Peter 'First Pope' St. John went on to state that if the Saudi Government didn't give in to its demands, it should expect more attacks. U.S. President Barack Obama was one of the first world leaders to condemn the attack, saying that Christian terrorism is wrong and that the people who committed such an atrocious act should be eliminated. He then stated that he will be flying to Riyadh soon to show solidarity with the Saudi people. Asked by reporters why he didn't do the same thing after the Charlie Hebdo massacre earlier this year in France, Obama responded, "what massacre in France?"

                In other news, the Japanese Government said that it is willing to accept some of the refugees who are fleeing war-torn Syria. Prime Minister Shinzo Abe, speaking to the press said, "our country has been racially and culturally homogeneous for too long. Its about time that we the Japanese people experience multiculturalism." "I think that it will be good for our country," Mr. Abe concluded, to loud cheers from Japanese and foreign journalists.

                 In the Vatican, Pope Francis I said that work is in place for the first synagogue to be built right next to St. Peter's Basilica. The Pontiff and successor of the first pope St. Peter, the apostle of Jesus, said that it was about time that the Catholic Church gives recognition to the Jewish people after all the wrongs that it has done to them in the past. The Pope also said that the synagogue will be named after the Virgin Mary.

                  In Ferguson, Missouri, USA, a mob of about twenty white rioters, angry over the result of a hockey game which they claimed was fixed, attacked a black news crew who went to cover the initial incident, beating a female reporter into a coma and then assaulting the camera man. One of the rioters filmed the whole incident on his mobile phone and was heard shouting: ''Stormfront!'' It was a reference to the White Supremacist website. Attorney General Loretta Lynch was quick to condemn the attack. She called it a hate crime and said that those caught will be brought to justice.

                  In sports news, Justin Gatlin said that he believes that reigning World and Olympic Champion Usain Bolt is using PED's. Gatlin was quoted as saying: "There's no way that that dude can run so fast and with such consistency." "I think he's doped." Bolt could not be reached for comment because he was in Jamaica training hard for his next meet and refused to answer any calls. In tennis, Maria Sharapova admitted that she is jealous of Serena Williams and her success. ''I really can't stand her.'' Sharapova is reported to have said. When pressed further, the Russian continued, ''if it wasn't for her I would have had more Grand Slams and an Olympic gold medal.'' She was then asked to explain how is it then that she lost the 2011 Wimbledon final to Petra Kvitova and the 2012 Australian Open final to Victoria Azarenka, when she came into both finals as the firm favorite to win seeing the it was both Ms. Kvitova's and Ms. Azarenka's first time appearing in Grand Slam finals and that she had been in finals before and even won some, Sharapova responded, ''Can't a girl have a bad day?''

               In entertainment news, a sex video of Miley Cyrus engaging in intimate acts with another unidentified girl and a guy is reported to be circulating on the internet. The video can be found on the website www.beaslut.com and can be downloaded for a small fee. Miley couldn't be reached for comment, but it is widely believed that the video was done to enhance her career, just like similar sex tape scandals enhanced the careers of Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian.

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